What a great word. That's what we'll call my recent disappearance from the bloggersphere. A hiatus. Because it sounds about ten times better than one of my usual excuses, which usually revolve around "I haven't felt like posting" or "I've been too busy" or "I've been too lazy" or a combination of all of the above. But let's put this excuse a little bit more delicately. Hiatus.
So there you have it! Your average vocabulary lesson from your friendly neighborhood Clumsy, as well as an eloquently put excuse.
So a quick recap of my life over the past two months. I've been studying my booty off for a class that isn't even required for my major, watching entirely too much Gossip Girl, eating a lot of tangerines, and writing more poetry than I ever thought myself capable of. And it isn't all horrible.
And I've been loving Mississippi State. Like... loving it. More than I ever expected to. I find myself smiling while walking to class instead of dragging my feet. Occasionally I use the word "yonder," and not ironically. I even wear oversized tshirts and nike shorts every now and then. But, unlike every other sorority girl in the SEC, I don't wear my chacos, because I've lost them.
But I'm still clumsy. In fact, I fell off of my bed a matter of minutes ago. Go figure.
But all of my happiness, all of my joy, all of my poetry and southern lingo is continually dampened by the fact that I have absolutely no idea what I want to do with my life.
By which I mean... No. Idea.
I mean, I have options. My major is broader than most, so my life could go in several different directions after graduation, which is a good thing, to a certain extent. But part of me wishes that I could just know, for once, the path that my life is going to follow. I don't consider myself to be a control freak by any stretch of the imagination; I'm not much of a planner, and I fly from one life plan to the next in the blink of an eye. But, the thing is that I really thought that by the end of freshman year I would have a slight clue as to the next step to take. But, alas, that is not the case. I'm as blind to my future now as I was a year ago.
So there's that.
And then there's this:
"Whether you turn to the right or to the left, you will hear a voice in your ear saying, 'This is the way; walk in it." Isaiah 30:21
I am such a mess. And God is so so so not. And that's the only reason I am able to enjoy life so much.
Clumsy.
